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We Are Not Objects | Mary Biever | One Writing Mother

We Are Not Objects

People are not objects.

Sometimes we meet people or grow up with people who treat us like objects. It can be hard to recognize.

The easiest and most recognizable form of treating people like objects is physical and sexual abuse. At a deep and personal level, the perpetrator hurts the victim. The victim could have been groomed before the attack – with gifts, emotional blackmail, and isolation. Then the perpetrator will do whatever it takes to either continue abusing the victim or keep the victim from reporting the crime.

The victim has become an object or toy instead of a person to the perpetrator.

There are other ways perpetrators treat people like objects but follow the same pattern. They groom a victim and set up their prey before taking action. How can someone be treated like an object without physical or sexual abuse?

  • The perpetrator can try to make the victim do things against the victim’s values or conscience.
  • The perpetrator can shame and ridicule the victim to destroy the victim’s self esteem.
  • The perpetrator can steal from the victim.
  • The perpetrator can defraud the victim or trick the victim into doing things the victim never intended.

The good news is – people are not objects.

Once a victim doesn’t mean always a victim. ┬áMy message to those in the above scenarios:

  • We are people, not objects.
  • You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
  • Do what you have to to get away from the perpetrator. Don’t go back.
  • Do what you have to to emotionally recover from what happened. Get help if you need it.
  • Once you have learned to survive as an objectified victim, you may need to learn new behavior patterns to prevent future abuse. It could be the same song, different verse, could be better but it’s going to be worse. Don’t fall into the traps of the past.
  • Learn new and better ways to interact with others.
  • Surround yourself with people who love and respect you for being you.

And one day, you will discover what happiness is. You deserve it.

See also – How to Pull Yourself Out of a Psycopath’s Cesspool


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  1. How to Pull Yourself Out of a Psychopath’s Cesspool | Mary Biever | One Writing Mother - April 19, 2014

    […] See also – We Are Not Objects […]

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